So today I got an e-mail from James Carville...you know, the barking dog of the Clintonistas. I guess now that Karl Rove is outta town, this guy wants to flash his rosey-cheeked, Botox injected face all over the place:
Anyway, he came knockin on my electronic door begging for a handout...in the middle of a recession...depression...whatever it is we are in. I love Democrats, here's his limp-noodle pitch (my preciousssss):
"You've got to hand it to the Republicans: they may have wrecked our economy, trampled on our Constitution, and trashed our country's reputation -- but they're always good for a chuckle.
Take Fox News' Bill O'Reilly, who recently declared himself "a middle-class guy," despite pulling down $10 million a year and never missing an opportunity to defend his fellow fat cats -- kind of like a cottonmouth calling itself a kitten. O'Reilly must get his "middle-class" sensibilities from hanging around out-of-touch Republicans like Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina, who last week filed a purely ideological lawsuit to block his own state from accepting $700 million in federal stimulus funds that would prevent ruinous cuts in public education.
Republican governors like Sanford are selling their states down the river to suck up to the likes of O'Reilly and Rush Limbaugh. And now the GOP is gunning to win enough governorships to hijack the congressional redistricting process that will follow the 2010 census -- to derail President Obama's agenda for change and spread Sanford's brand of so-called "compassionate conservatism" across our entire country.
To jam a stick in their spokes, the Democratic Governors Association (DGA) needs your immediate help to meet its $50,000 May fundraising goal. And if you contribute by midnight tomorrow, your gift will be matched by a leading DGA supporter -- doubling the impact of your support."
I'm not even going to respond to the absurdity of me giving money to any party that signs off billions of dollars on a whim, I'll let the esteemed MEP from across the way tell our yippity-yip Mr. Carville how much his barking sucks:
Notice the key phrases:
"...You cannot carry on forever squeezing the productive bit of the economy in order to fund an unprecedented engorgement of the unproductive bit." --Daniel Hannan
"You cannot spend your way out of recession, or borrow your way out of debt." --Daniel Hannan
As for Mr. Carville's "down the river" comment. Let me just say this. If you haven't read Puddinhead Wilson, by our nation's greatest author to-date, please do. Puddinhead Wilson is a story of two brothers switched at birth, one is white, one is black. Don't ask me how that works, go read the book. The irony of Twain's story here is that the "white" brother gets "sold down the river" into slavery in the end and the "black" brother is emancipated/exonerated. We find ourselves laughing at the fact that Tom, the mean, white brother, a guy who sold his own mother into slavery, is being sold down the river in the end. Until we release that we've just celebrated the enslavement of a person...irony...then we kinda bow our heads and wonder if our hypocrisy will ever end.
Carville rips O'Reilly for defending his fellow fat cats--and then uses this opportunity to defend and support HIS fat cat friends in power...Hypocrite.
Carville expects us to believe that Republicans are responsible for a trashed economy when we all know that every minute of every day after the tech bubble, after 9-11, after Enron, after WorldComm, after continued increase in governments on EVERY level over the last twenty-five years this depression was a possibility...maybe even an inevitability. Hypocrite.
Carville knows the stimulous package is not stimulating--cannot stimulate. Is Chrysler going to file? Is G.M.? Where is Time Warner? What's happening to newspapers all across America? Where do we realize that shoving money at the private sector's problems is simply a failed policy? Aren't the Democrats the party of Europhiliacs? Shouldn't we then be listening to the French and British parlimentarians on this one? Give back that stimulus money! We don't want your fake dollar, based on fake interest, based on fake consumer confidence! WE HAVE NO CONFIDENCE IN YOU, YOU HYPOCRITE.
Mr. Carville wants us to send him our money? I'll send him a song instead. Here's my contribution to the Church of Barrack, because the Church of Barrack is the Church of the Suicidal.
That's right, I want you to make it hurt!
And when the Republicans come around asking for a hand-out, they'll get the same damned song.
Oh, and if you're confused about all the Tolkien references above, check this out, You gotta wait till the end, just skip what you saw already, I couldn't use this to begin with because MSNBC cut out some of his most poignant points. I love this guy:
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